Hello this is my blog. My name is Jerry Lee Willcockson. I am now 44 years old. I currently live in Ypsilanti Mi. I have a story to tell as hard as it is to tell it. I was born in Japan Oct 27 1960. I have always felt different all my life. I grew up all over as my father was in the U S Airforce. I was a funny child. The class clown. I liked the attenion and love to make people smile. It set me apart and I got along with everyone. My teen years were wild I had two older brothers and we were the W boys. I got into drugs at a early age. Ive tried just about everything out except shooting up (Thank God). Im not sure why I started down that path. I felt at the time I was in with the in crowd. Those years were some of the happiest times for me for some reason perhaps it was the drugs. We would just hang in the neighborhood and get high. We werent wild wild we were middleclass kids. I would go to class so whacked out its a wonder I made through. After High School I hung around for a bit and releized I was going nowhere so I myself joined the Airforce in 1981 I was stationed in Texas the whole time. While I was in basic training my high school sweetheart wrote that I was to become a father. I married her. We went on to have another child in 1983. A boy and A girl. We split in 1988 and the joys of fatherhood had changed forever. I got out of the Air Force in 1991 and moved to Florida with my brothers for work. My brother owned a roofing company. I was not cut out for that kind of work and quickly moved on to Austin Tx. I was dating a girl at the time that was my dream girl a that time a blondbombshell knock out that took a liking to me I was 31 and she 21. She wasnt the smartest girl in the world but we loved each other at that time. After we split Id say about 1994 I felt an urge to go home. This whole time I was still whacked out of my mind. I moved back to Michigan to be around family. I got a job the first day back as a waiter. I have always worked as a waiter, bartender even in the Air Force. The money is good and you get paid everyday. I worked at a seafood place for about 5 years then he sold the place and I moved on. I took about 3 days off and got another job as a waiter in Ypsilanti. A apartment opened up over the top of the bar and I moved in. This is where the story gets strange. Im not going to name names because this is my account of my story and I dont feel it would be rite to put this out over the internet without permission. Please note that I am not a good speller nor is my grammer up to par. I may perhaps edit this to make those corrections but for now I would like to tell the story as it flows from my mind. Also the short story above is just to get you up to speed on who I am there is so much more to that story as well.
The year now is 1999. Life is great. I live and work at the same place. A neighborhood bar where I fit in. Money is good. Socail life is coming along just fine. No stress in driving to work. Im on top of the world. The owner has taken a liking to me. A wonderful waitress has taken a eye on me. She was funny, loving, happy, and very pleasing to the eye. The art of love was in the air. She was a school teacher as well with no childern. The kind of girl you can only dream of. This is the first time the feeling came on to me as I remember. Something came over me. The first time all I could say was wow. So that is what I called it. To me it was truth. I was sitting in the bar when all at once it was like a door opened in my mind. I could hear everything almost feel emotion of every person all around me. I even stood up. I had never had a feeling like that before. I was hearing and seeing things that I hadn't felt before. I was with two friends at the time and they were shocked as well when I got up. They asked me what was happening and all I could say was WOW. I started feeling as something was trying to talk to me by showing me things that were rite in front of me that no one else could see. As I say no one else could see they could see but were not reading into it as I was. I was a big drinker at that time. On the computer at work you must always add a drink for every order weather or not there was a drink on the tap. There was a button on the back page that said "No Drink Water". I found myself pushing that button more and more as if someone was trying to make me see that through using my custermors. I red into it as someone was trying to tell me to quit drinking. The rug in the hallway was always moving and bunching up. I red into that as if it was saying "stop moving around straighten up". I had always ran from my problems rather than stick around to fix them. I had been a very per-miss-cue-iss person in the past. I felt I had to talk about it to my new love interest. I dont want to go into what was said but I did tell her the truth and she did not want to see me anymore. I had myself tested after that and had a clean bill of health and state of mind. I stayed sober for a short stretch and went back to drinking. While at that time of being sober I saw things heard things. In music and on TV as well like something or (wow) was talking to me direct very hard to explain and remember. I dont want to go into details as Im not sure I can explain it so you would understand. A few years went by relitively normal. I met another waitress that took a liking to me. She was 22 at the time I recall and I was 40. I was not looking for love at that time. It still happened she was the persuer. She made me happier than any other women I had been with. It was not even all sexual. In fact we enjoyed each others company more so than sex although the love making was good. She was wise beyond her years and had a beauty all her own. She shined like a lite. Our #s even matched up I was 40 she was 22 that equels 4. When I was 41 she was 23 those equel 5 and so on and so on do the math. We were very happy and I had even gotton down on the knee and she said yes. We now go back to 4/20/03 Easter Sunday. A few days before I had started getting a pain in my stomach. The pain got so bad I had to go to the hospital that day. I have a condition known as Die-ver-tic-u-lie-tus its a major pain. I had to change my lifestyle and eating habits. I was 42 at the time. This is where the story gets very very strange. I quit drinking again. I started seeing the # 42 or 420 everwhere. Like a sign. I did not know why but it was everywhere. I was hearing the train whistle blow thru town whenever I thought of things pertaining to a higher power. 42 is imbedded in me for some reason. My father was born on 14th and my mother on the 12th. Like it was encoded in me for some reason. It still to this day pops up everwhere. My licsense,libary card, and so many others. I could tell you more of this if you ask but there are to many to name. Anyway you get the picture. Then for some reason I took on the role of Jesus. Yes that is what I said Jesus I thought I was him. After all my parents are a Mary an Joseph. My mother is really Marilyn but you get the connection. Meanwhile I had started a small business that I had named JiggaJoe. Jigga as I understand the term means The Man in charge. Joe is my father whom has past on. In my mind it was a father and son business from the heavens and beyond. I was on a manic high that I did not feel I was ever coming off. I started selling T Shirts under that name with a local icon on them and a Jiggajoe logo. I got much support at first. I wrote a letter that I called the Jiggajoe letter of truth. It was like I was not even writing it. I have never been able to write I just dont have it in me. With all these thoughts racing thru my head I just tried to keep up with the energy inside me. It was meant to be a letter of peace and a telling of who I really was so I may free my soul. All good things must come to a end and my world was about to change forever. I told my soul mate that I thought that I may be Jesus. Mind you that I had kept this inside of me for so long. Months I would say before I thought of talking about it to anyone. I had even told a friend the one on the shirts before her. Well to make a long story short she was floored. People were starting to talk behind my back even before I told her. I was at that time working at another bar and my boss was giving me some flack over my hair. I had been thru this once before with him and we came to a agreement, after the second time I felt it was time to leave. On the way home I had saw a guy who I saw in the summer walking by it was very cold that nite 12/23/03 I think. In the summer I had over heard him say he was looking to move because of landlord problems. That nite I had asked where he moved and he told me he was sleeping outside. He said he thought he was going to freeze to death that nite so he opened his eyes to look at his dog. I could not let him go so I invited him in. He stayed a few days. Something happened that nite I tried everything I could to find him a place but no one cared. The next day my fience or love you get it was on the phone getting her phone service switched over. For some reason still unknown to me I became inraged and started yelling very foul things at her. Something came over me. There is more to this as well. My mind was going at lite speed. I could not block out anything. If I was to regret one moment of my life or could change one moment in time it would be that one. We split. I still to this day love her with all my heart. Im so sorry for that moment. I never hurt her pysically but the words were more damaging that any weapon on this planet. I did find him a place thru a higher calling as well. Maybe that was my purpose to save his life perhaps. I saved his and lost what I had of mine. After that I sold just about everything I owned on a wim and went to New York City on a one way train ticket. Now the story gets even stranger.I will start a new paragraph.
Ok here we go. New York was a magic place. For some reason I felt the need to make contact with Howard Stern. I had been writing him emails for sometime with all the ideas that flooded my mind. I had no fear. I felt it was only a matter of time till someone would find me and make sense of my thoughts. The first nite in New York a cab driver took me all around New York for free. He showed me Ground Zero, Wall Street, The Garment District, Time Square and Canel Street as I am a Lou Reed fan and I wanted to see where he wrote his songs, all for no fee. He saw something in me at that time and offered advise. He even told me that if I was coming to New York To be someone they already knew I was there. Who were they I still do not know? But I understood at that time. The next day guitar in hand and wearing a suit and a hat I went out to make a name for myself. I looked for Virgin Records and found there store in Time Square . This was a place where they just sold records. The guy behind the counter called Virgin Records the main office for new artists and they said come over. He even said I hope you make it. I was dressed for the part. Beleive It or not the address was either 4 20th Street or 20 4th street. I again felt this was a sign. I cried at the counter on the 4th floor as I put my demo in. What I have not told you above was I put a Demo Cd by mail as I am a guitar player and singer. I was trying anything I could to keep JiggaJoe alive. And again beleive it or not when I mailed that demo out to Virgin Records it was post marked 420 pm in the afternoon. I received my bank statement on my birthday 10/27/03 and had 4 dollars and 20 cents in my account by no math done by me. I did not plan this on my account it just came together that way. Anyway to get back to New York. After that I just started walking around the city. I was called over by what I thought was a homeless man who called himself Greywolf. To this day I still do not know who he was. He told me that he had played guitar with Carlos Santanna. He took me all around the city by foot. It was very cold. He knew everyone in that city. He was a somebody. He showed me the ins and outs and took care of me as a father would care for a nie-eve son. We ate different things that were native to New York. I felt like a prince. I invited him to stay with me in my hotel. He slept on the floor even though I offered him to sleep in my bed and I would sleep on the floor ( I felt he deserved respect) in that tiny tiny hotel by the Jersey shore line. The next day he took me in the subway to play guitar and make money. We went to a pizza shop on 14th street and had a wonderful breakfast. Again he knew the people in that shop and I paid only about two bucks for both of us to eat like kings. He had even got me a gig playing there that nite for tips after the bar crowd let out. He beleived in me so I beleived in myself. The cab driver that I had spoke of earlier told me to go to a church. I cant remember which one but it is a big one across for Carnigee Hall again Im sorry for me spelling. Some thing to do with Kathey Lee Gifford. So I did go there. I talked to a guy there that ran like a reading room for that church. I told him my story. He did not understand. At that time I was getting low on money and was starting to worry how would I live. I made the dission to call Amtrek. They offered me a free ticket back as I got into New York on a 8 hour delay. I took it. I did not play the pizza shop how I wish now I would have stayed. I was to meet Greywolf back at the 14st subway. I did see him one more time. He was talking to another guitar player a female and was boosting her as he did me. Almost like he was helping another lost soul. Just then I met the most amazing person I think Ive ever met. A man came up to me in the 14st subway and called me JiggaJoe The Man. He knew allot of stuff about me. He said people couldnt believe I made it to and was in New York. He said allot of people cared about me. He knew where I was staying even the room # which was 444. He called himself Crazy Eddie. He even said that Howard Stern was looking for me and I was all over the news New York Channel 1. He even knew where I had worked at and mentioned my old bosses name. Told me to say hello to her. I was blown away. He knew I had been emailing Howard Stern. At one point he pointed out someone that looked like Howard Stern from behind. He said Howard is tall isnt that him I had never really seen Howard Stern before and did not know he was as tall before I saw that person in the subway. He did look like him from behind. I wanted to catch up to him but Crazy Eddie said that he doesnt like being chased. I respected that. Me in a big city and not knowing anyone except Greywolf, which I dont really know and he is telling me personal things that he could not know about me. He was a very happy man. We talked for about a half hour as I recall. At one point he made reference as to why I didnt buy a lottery ticket to which I replyed I wasnt in it for the money. He made it seem like I could win. He told me to come back in the summer. Which I did(That is another story). I asked how will I know to get ahold of you and his only reply was "Call Ilene". Before I came to New York I posted the Jiggajoe letter of truth all over the internet. You can find it by typing Jiggajoe in Google search. Most everything you will find about JiggaJoe on Google has something to do with me. Someone had read my letter before I left to New York and replyed back by saying "you still must find your Mystery". I beleive I have. Who is Crazy Eddie. What does Call Ilene mean. Perhaps one day when Im crossing the street I will hear someone say Call Ilene when I turn to look I may get struck by a bus and Crazy Eddie will be waiting to take me home. I dont know. I will always be looking for him and listening for those words till the day I die I will never forget that time in the subway. That same nite with most of my worries behind me and a train ticket back I decided to play some more in a long hallway in the subway kinda by Penn Station. As I played another strange charicter approached me. He had a evil look to him. He listened to me play for abit and started talking to me. He had a thick accent perhaps Russin or something along that sound. He was making me nervous. He wanted me to play the blues for him. Im not much of a blues player but I do have a few in me. I did play for him. He offered me a job driving for him and said I could make allot of money. He was very intoxicated. Also he gave me his Hotel room # and phone # for his cell phone. He wanted me to find women and come see him which I did not, he gave me the creeps like the flag was up and the hair on the back of my neck was standing on end. As he walked away he turned around and gave me that stare of evil and beleive or not again his last words to me were " Will you sell your soul to the devil". I replyed no and that was the last I saw of him. I do in my heart beleive that he was the Devil at that moment if that makes sense. It was my crossroads. Anyway I am back in Michigan now. JiggaJoe is a dream of mine. It was not created to cause anyone pain but It has for me. I was comitted to the hospital for a short stay. They say I am Bipolar. Maybe I am Maybe Im not. All I can say is something drove me to this. I would not have chosen this path on my own. I now do not beleive I am Jesus Christ. I can not be sure this will not happen again. I can not stop looking for my Mystery I have come to far to turn back now. I must live with what happened as I can not change my past its part of who I am. I can say Im so sorry for the people that Ive hurt in searching for my quest. Please remember I did not mean for this to hurt anyone. I did not have control over this. I have lost so much. I cry sometimes for days trying to make sense of this. I have lost the love of my life. I did not understand what was happening to me and still dont. Please do not think of me as crazy. This has been over a year now Ive come back with more focus. Im just trying to tell my story. I dont even really know why I wrote this blog. I felt like telling you what happened. Its not everyday that you get to become Jesus. I still feel that it is more of a blessing than a burden. I welcome any comments or questions you may have. If you can help me to make any sense of what is written here or just want to comment please reply. I want JiggaJoe to live more than anything Ive ever wanted. Thank You for taking the time to read my Blog
